NOT AGAIN!
I never knew what it was like to have a father figure. I happen to have only my mom as both parents. She tried so hard to fill in the gap of a father and a mother but we humans are structured to uphold one role at a time because no matter how hard she tried, that gap was literally not able to be filled up.
I never saw the need to ask but my little mind always wondered why I had one parent unlike other kids. Well all that mattered was that I was happy; we were happy,as happy as we can be but secrets don't like to stay secret and indiscretion comes with a lot of baggage.
We called them insubstantial but as time unravels, the need to ask and know came staring to our faces. I had to ask. I ought to know.
I lost my one and only friendship to this dern. Amina was my best friend and more of a sister I never had_ she was forbidden to have anything to do with a child with no root.
Despite my unwilling sacrifice on this altar of secrecy, my mom swore never to let the cat out of its bag. She was prepared to take them to her grave. A secret has to remain as one.
We called them insubstantial but as time unravels, the need to ask and know came staring to our faces. I had to ask. I ought to know.
I lost my one and only friendship to this dern. Amina was my best friend and more of a sister I never had_ she was forbidden to have anything to do with a child with no root.
Despite my unwilling sacrifice on this altar of secrecy, my mom swore never to let the cat out of its bag. She was prepared to take them to her grave. A secret has to remain as one.
Alas! Was it a secret?
It was an obvious truth I lived with, till her last days.
It was an obvious truth I lived with, till her last days.
Time, they say, is the best healing factor but also, An apple never falls far from its tree; the blemish within always finds its way to tarnish oneself despite the compromise.
Living without a man figure wasn't forever; Men of different timbre and caliber were now at my beck and call, wishing for nothing else and willing to do my bidding just to hear me say the word YES to their advances.
Well, what can I say? I turned out to be a beautiful and stunning woman, who wasn't just pretty but beauty with brains_ A chief executive officer to one of the most popular advertisement companies. What more can any man ask for?.
On one of those occasions, I went to get lunch from my usual eatery and this vibrant young man walked to me and said "I apologize if am a little bit forward, but you are extremely gorgeous and too alluring"_ I already knew how beautiful I am but he described it in the most pleasant manner, leaving red glow on my face.
Well, what can I say? I turned out to be a beautiful and stunning woman, who wasn't just pretty but beauty with brains_ A chief executive officer to one of the most popular advertisement companies. What more can any man ask for?.
On one of those occasions, I went to get lunch from my usual eatery and this vibrant young man walked to me and said "I apologize if am a little bit forward, but you are extremely gorgeous and too alluring"_ I already knew how beautiful I am but he described it in the most pleasant manner, leaving red glow on my face.
It has to be him. it just had to be Grey; he has the perfect physique and knows how to flatter a woman, aside from him coming from a wealthy home. He was endowed with all the qualities I visioned for my man. Money wasn't the main deal for me but he had it all. A true definition of perfection.
And there was also Chris_ I had to turn down to. Who will see a full package and decide to go for average? I guess none.
One severely complicating factor about love is that it will blindfold one's eye and when the red flags seem obvious, we still persist in ignorance.
He was not always there when I needed him. I was totally in this relationship all by myself but I still defended him with the words of how busy he could be.
He was not always there when I needed him. I was totally in this relationship all by myself but I still defended him with the words of how busy he could be.
During our hang out one certain weekend. I popped out the question “what do you think about a lady proposing to a man?” His mouth looked too heavy to reply.
“Well, it will be nice to see a lady propose to me” He muttered
“Well, it will be nice to see a lady propose to me” He muttered
My joy knew no bounds when I heard him. Immediately I asked him to be my forever, to walk down the aisle with me. Yes, I proposed to him right in front of that mob. At least I got to hear him say YES.
Marriage preparations were next in line. I was ready to spend my last dime,to go against the women's code just to have him. Moreover, I was carrying a mini him.
I walked into his house, only to overhear his friends calling me Desperate and he said I wasn't just desperate but extremely.
In shame and pain I left_with tears and misery which flow from the heart betrayed by the one she loves and I am left alone going through this emotion. And Once again, History gets to repeat itself. A girl raised by a single mother is also about to become a single mother. I swore never to end up this way. I thought I could change the tides of destiny. I fell in love with a man giving him my heart and burying it all but what did I get in return? Nothing but pain and anguish. Chris came to me with genuine love and I let it slide; hoping that Grey would fill that void in my life, thinking I was basking in the reality of my dreams but it was all a lie yet what can a broken woman say?. Grey Solomon, you will never see this child_ this must be how mom felt too. Who knows.
In shame and pain I left_with tears and misery which flow from the heart betrayed by the one she loves and I am left alone going through this emotion. And Once again, History gets to repeat itself. A girl raised by a single mother is also about to become a single mother. I swore never to end up this way. I thought I could change the tides of destiny. I fell in love with a man giving him my heart and burying it all but what did I get in return? Nothing but pain and anguish. Chris came to me with genuine love and I let it slide; hoping that Grey would fill that void in my life, thinking I was basking in the reality of my dreams but it was all a lie yet what can a broken woman say?. Grey Solomon, you will never see this child_ this must be how mom felt too. Who knows.